Bad Mama


Filler
November 24, 2008, 6:32 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

Not only was I dealing with my grandpa’s memorial service and all the stuff around it last week, it seems I was suffering from a sinus infection and probably strep throat (didn’t bother testing ’cause I was getting antibiotics anyway). So that’s what happened to me. Anyway, I can now get pictures up on the blog! Woohoo! However, first I am going to give you a link to click on. We had some pictures done of the girls this weekend, and the photographer has a couple of them up on her blog. So if you are in the Madison area and need some photos done, please consider Lea Wolf. She has a wonderful way with kids, and as you can see, takes gorgeous photos, and for reasonable prices.



Win some, not others
November 17, 2008, 9:15 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

So I don’t know when we find out how we did in the Best Baby Boutique contest, but I can tell you who won something from me for voting. I numbered each post that voted, and Peanut chose a number, et voila! The ever elusive Mete won! Mete has a choice between a mama gift and a baby/kid gift, so email me. When she chooses, I’ll let you know what I’m sending. Hee! That was fun! I’d do it again except that I can’t really afford it…

Grandpa’s memorial is Friday. I think that we’ve decided that Peanut can come, since it isn’t a full-on service with a casket or anything.  More a gathering of family members to talk about the same old stories and how sad it is we don’t get together except at funerals anymore, you know how it is.  Still, this is a branch of the family that I really didn’t get to know until I was an adult, and they happen to be the nice branch of my father’s family (as opposed to the, well, I probably shouldn’t go there).

I miss my grandfather. But I’ve really missed him for a while, because he’d been in a decline for quite some time. So in a way, I’ve already grieved him. On the other hand, I can still feel his skin under my fingers as I stroked his hand that night, and the shape of his fingers against the sheets.



I’m so not paying for this wedding
November 14, 2008, 7:03 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

I totally blew NaBloPoMo by not posting. I was deeply involved in genealogy stuff, and completely forgot.

But that’s ok! Because I didn’t have a good story until now, anyway.

So today I go to Peanut’s preschool for parent-teacher conferences. I go early, and get to sit down with them while they eat. Peanut sits next her her “boyfriend”, J. I help J with his lunchbox, and he thanks me by putting his hand on my stomach and asking, “Is there a baby in there?”

“No, there isn’t.”

“Yes there is! There’s a lump there.”

“Well, there’s no baby, J.”

“Why is there a lump there?”

“That’s just how I’m built. There is no baby.”

He then reaches up, and grabs my breast. “But there’s a lump THERE!”

“J!” I grab his hands. “You know that touching a woman there is not ok. It is not ok to do that.”

I let go. He reaches up, this time to my face, and puts his finger on an acne cyst. “You have a red bump on your face.”

Aaaand then I got up and left.



Self-confidence
November 12, 2008, 9:10 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

If you recall, a few weeks ago Peanut was having trouble with some kids in school being mean to her. Apparently, things have much improved. Tonight, she announced the following:

“All the boys in the school want me to be their girlfriend. I just know it.”

Also, while dropping her off this morning, a child I had never met before walked up to me and said, “Hi Carrie” and walked away. It was somewhat surreal. When I told Peanut this tonight, she said, “Maybe she snuck up on you and secretly met you and you didn’t even know it!”

I don’t know what they are feeding the children at that school, but I may want some of it.



Veteran’s Day
November 11, 2008, 9:59 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

I know Veteran’s Day is supposed to be about living vets, but my granddad was alive until yesterday, so I’m going to count him in.

He served in the US Army Signal Corps during WW II. He was originally assigned to be a paratrooper, but he blew out his knee in training. Since he had a good head for numbers and mechanical stuff, so they put him there. He didn’t leave the country, but he did leave my grandmother, who spent most of the war at her family farm, where my father was born. When he was released from service, he went to college, earning a CPA degree thanks to the GI Bill. He helped support his family while he was in school and until he had a well-paying job by repairing TVs and radios, like he learned to do in the army. He was proud of his service, but he never made a big deal out of it. He mostly liked to talk about the places he got to go and the fun he got to have.

Here he is with my dad, after he got to come home. He’s in his uniform. I wish I could find a better one right now, because I think he was rather handsome:

grandpa1



Rest in Peace
November 10, 2008, 7:28 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

Rodney Vernon Lindgren 25 Dec 1913 – 10 Nov 2008.

I sat with him a while last night, swabbing his mouth with water to make him more comfortable while listening to his death rattles. I held his hand, told him that we all loved him, and that while I hoped that he would get better, I understood if he was tired. I don’t believe he knew I was there, but if he did, I wanted him to know he was loved.

We’re making the arrangements today, whatever they are. I think the worst part of all of this is going to be dealing with my aunt, who has long made it clear that she doesn’t like or care about any of us, and I don’t think that’s suddenly going to change now.

I miss him.



No title can express the way I feel
November 9, 2008, 4:12 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

I was in the middle of writing a post about all the milestones Squirt has hit recently when I got a call from the nursing home where my grandfather has been living. Something has happened in the last day or so, and while his vital signs are still strong, he is no longer really “there”. I went to visit him this afternoon and there was no acknowledgment that I was holding his hand except that he kept trying to pull it away to brush the oxygen cannula off his face. His eyes don’t focus and he is not speaking. I believe his brain has said good-bye, but the message has yet to get to his heart and lungs, but that’s only a matter of time.

My grandfather was, by most accounts (including his own), not a great father. But he’s been an excellent grandfather. He is affectionate and generous and patient, always happy to see us and never forgetting a special occasion. I have been very lucky to have him as long as I have.

I do not know what his future holds. Perhaps this is being caused by an infection that hasn’t given him a fever yet, or some other temporary condition. I don’t think so. He would be 95 on Christmas Day, and there is no cure yet for old age.

If you are reading this, and feel so inclined, I would appreciate prayers to ease his way. He is, I believe, suffering right now, and he deserves better. Thank you.