Bad Mama


We interrupt this blog break*
January 27, 2008, 1:09 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

to bring you the news that THE NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK ARE REUNITING!

I guess my mom was right when she said I didn’t have to see them that time when I was 16 because I’d get another chance. Though she was wrong about Nirvana.

C’mon, how can you resist?

(Blogging break brought to you by ridiculous issues with our internet connection – it just happens to be working right now, but there are no guarantees for the next five minutes)



Daily Peanut
January 9, 2008, 7:28 pm
Filed under: Peanut, Squirt

I explain to Peanut that I can’t eat peanut butter because it makes Squirt sick when I do (along with dairy, soy, and something else involved in corn chips and salsa). I hand her her plate of bread and peanut butter, and she sings to herself, “All the peanut butter for me, ’cause I’m not nursing a baby.”



Birthday gift
January 6, 2008, 12:54 pm
Filed under: Parenting, Peanut

Last night was my family birthday dinner at my mom’s. Peanut had been excused and was in her nightgown, playing in the living room. She suddenly appeared at my elbow and announced to me, “I loooove having a bare butt all the time at a birthday party. It’s very nice.”

She then proceeded to turn away from the table, hike up her nightie to show her bare behind, and start shaking it at us while singing a little “doot dee doo” song.

Obviously, she’s feeling better.



Aha
January 4, 2008, 7:51 pm
Filed under: Parenting, Peanut

Peanut’s diagnosis: Clostridium Difficile Colitis

Wow, does that suck. She’s doing better now, and will start new antibiotics to treat it tomorrow. She spent several hours in the ER, and got an IV with morphine to help her out. She’s hilarious on morphine, btw.

In order to facilitate the IV placement, a bribe was required. And after seeing my baby in as much or more pain as she’s ever had after any surgery, and telling her she would have to get a needle into her tiny little hand with its funky AMC anatomy, I caved and sent Grammy to the store. This made things much more tolerable. She named the red panda that comes with it after the ER doctor, Mike.

Part of her morphine hilarity was her insistence that her father preside over a wedding of her and Barbie. Because she loved her so much she had to marry her. She had a squeaky, hoarse voice from a day’s worth of crying, and she was so serious in reciting the vows. Big Daddy whispered to me that he was very sorry he would not get to be there the first time she ever gets high.



Happy Birthday to Me
January 2, 2008, 11:47 am
Filed under: Parenting, Peanut, Squirt

Peanut woke up this morning and said, “Mama, you still have a big belly”.

“Yes, Peanut, I do. It’s going to take a while yet to get back to normal”

“Yeah, it’s going to take a really loooong time for you to be able to fit into your wedding dress again.”

Also, I have thrush, am flirting with mastitis, and Peanut is going to the doctor this afternoon because she has continued stomach pain.

I think I’ll turn 35 another day. Believe me, I am more tired of how whiny I’ve become than you are.