Bad Mama

It’s about balance
May 30, 2007, 7:56 pm
Filed under: Peanut

The Good: Peanut gets her cast off tomorrow! Yay! We’ll finally all get some sleep!

The Bad: After we drop Peanut off at Grandma’s, Big Daddy will come back home and meet the vet, who will be putting our sweet old cat, Bridget, to sleep. I will not be there, because I have truly reached my limit when it comes to the stress I can handle right now.

She has been a good cat, and we’ll miss her. Particularly Peanut, because Bridget is the only one that will tolerate her “petting” and will sit next to her for any length of time.  It sucks.


Memorial Day
May 28, 2007, 5:17 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized





29 FEBRUARY 1944

Mr. and Mrs. William E. Stewart

Poynette, Wisconsin

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Stewart,

It is with the deepest regret that I confirm the telegram previously sent you notifying you of the death of your son, Major Harlan E. Stewart, U.S. Marine Corps Reserve.

Major Stewart was killed in action on February 25, 1944 when his plane crashed after it had been struck and damaged by enemy anti-aircraft fire. His body was recovered and was buried in the cemetery at the advance base from which this squadron is operating. You will understand of course that for reasons of security, the location of this base cannot be divulged at the present time…

World War II Navy, Marine, and Coast Guard Casualties, 1941-1945

Wisconsin Dead

Major Harlan Stewart Killed in Action in Pacific

In Command of Forty Fighter Planes

According to a telegram received Saturday by Mr. and Mrs. William Stewart of Route 2, their son, Major Harlan Stewart, 28, U.S.M.C. flight commander, whose promotion was announced last week, has been killed in action in the Southwest Pacific … Surviving him besides his parents are two sisters, Mrs. Doris L.– at home with her parents [because she had a newborn while her husband, my grandfather, was stationed elsewhere], and Catherine, a radio instructor formerly at Truax but now of Scott Field, Ill. [a Morse code instructor, she was not married because her fiance had also been killed in action in Europe], and one brother, Kenneth, on Route 2.

I quit stressing about the princess stuff
May 22, 2007, 7:26 pm
Filed under: Peanut

She did these, and finds them hilarious. I went to high school with girls whose hair looked remarkably like Belle’s there.

Pregnancy stuff you can’t wait to hear about
May 22, 2007, 5:09 pm
Filed under: Parenting, Pistachio

My belly button is starting to turn inside-out.

This is news, because it didn’t happen the last time around. In fact, I am now almost as large as I ever got with Peanut, and I just might post the pictures to prove it. It helps that small cats weigh more than she did when she was born.

There are several things that either are new or I am anticipating will be new this time around. For example:

  • I never felt Peanut do flips. She did one, when she went from transverse to breech, but that’s it. This kid, I get it a couple of times a day. It’s weird, like I’m on an upside-down roller coaster.
  • I never was woken up or kept awake by Peanut moving. I am discovering this may have been a blessing.
  • I never got hemorrhoids.
  • I never had an internal exam, so I have no idea if or how much I was ever dilated.
  • I never experienced labor. I had one contraction that woke me up from a sound sleep around 33 weeks, but just one.
  • We never had to babyproof. We do have some clamps on drawers/cabinets, but only because we got tired of holding the door closed while she tried to open them.
  • I never gave a wiggly newborn a bath. She didn’t move much the first weeks, and then she was in casts for months and couldn’t have baths, and then she was afraid of them.
  • I never cleaned her umbilical stump. We were in the hospital a full week, and it fell off as soon as we got home.
  • I’ve never held her hand while walking across the street or in a parking lot. She needs two for the walker, and she’s too slow to let her walk at all at an intersection. So I’ve never had to worry about her running off and getting lost. Or bouncing on the bed, or climbing the furniture. Though she’s certainly managed to fall and bump her head.

I’m not whining about these things. It’s just weird to me that I’m having my second kid, while having so little experience with some things that are supposed to go along with it.

I was also not working when I was this pregnant with Peanut, and stayed at home for 18 months after. So that whole maternity-leave thing will be new too. It’s the only part I’m sorry to have to experience.

A good day (knock on wood)
May 17, 2007, 2:03 pm
Filed under: Disability, Peanut, Pistachio

Things around here are much, much better. Peanut still wakes frequently and needs help going back to sleep, but during the day her mood is pretty much back to normal. It would be nice if she would eat something other than buttered toast, but we can’t have everything, can we?

My dad is not doing especially fantastically with his rehab. He seems to have an unrealistic idea of how much he’s recovered, and thinks that he should be driving and out and about on his own, when in reality, he still has trouble walking.

My dad hasn’t been known for his athletic abilities for a long time, so it isn’t so shocking to see his physical decline. What is hard is the mental part. My father is/was a force of nature. He could and did speak about nearly any topic with at least some authority and a strong opinion. He could argue circles around me, and I’m not known for being particularly wishy-washy. This was a guy who did the Times crossword in pen, in order, but now doesn’t read the whole paper because he can’t quite follow the news stories. His significant other says that now when they go to restaurants, the staff doesn’t speak to him. I tell her that’s an example of ableism (or disableism), and you can tell she hasn’t ever thought about this before. I guess the mental decline might be a blessing if it means he hasn’t noticed this himself, because it’s his idea of a living nightmare.

It’s also an interesting bit of karma. He’s maybe not a full-on bigot, but that’s probably more a matter of degree. But according to my mother, he was at his most contemptuous with regard to people who were disabled, particularly if they couldn’t speak clearly or follow complex conversations well. Which now describes him.  And yes, this attitude has made things somewhat strained regarding his lovely granddaughter.

Sorry about all this pointless rambling, it’s just an issue that I’ve been dealing with lately. So on to the little nut news!

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Why it’s worth it
May 14, 2007, 2:24 am
Filed under: Parenting, Peanut

Peanut: Mama, you’re already a super-hero.

Bad Mama: I am? What are my super-powers?

Peanut: Hmmm. You can SUPER-EAT!

Bad Mama: Is that so? Anything else?

Peanut: You can super-smell, and super-taste*, and SUPER-SLEEP!

And my kid has, if not super, then at least average powers of perception.

*Strangely enough, I am a super-taster.

It’s apparently the new normal
May 11, 2007, 5:26 pm
Filed under: Boo boo, Parenting, Peanut

So apparently I spoke too soon. After being screamed at because it was insufficiently dark outside at 2:30 am, what with the security lights and all, I have come to the conclusion that my child had some sort of Jekyll/Hyde experiment done on her. I know some of you can’t understand what the fuss is about, but seriously, this stuff is just so unlike her. She wasn’t like this when she was two. And it’s happened like a switch got flipped.

Even better? Big Daddy will be gone all next week for work. I might just show up on your doorstep with, or possibly without, a smelly, sweaty, screaming kid in a pink cast in tow. Just a head’s up.

For those of you that have commented with support and questions, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart, and I promise to respond soon. If you have not had the experience of this overwhelming support from total strangers before, maybe it is hard to believe, but it really means so much. Big Daddy was blown away when I showed him the number of page loads that this blog got on Monday and Tuesday. I forget myself how unnecessary it is to say something profound or especially eloquent in the comments when the writer needs support. Just knowing that people who don’t have to took just a few moments to jot a note to you makes a big difference.